The Supposed-Final Sem

This Semester has been cra-zzz so far. like seriously. lotsa things happened. managed to handle some, but there's always something that nearly screw things up, (or they actually did) and it's that something that put a test on your ability, maturity. I think i failed the test in a way.

ok, while I'm stilll waiting for the freaking slow download here, lets continue a lil bit more...

Erm, what should I say? I'm here climbing up from every single fall, like a little kids, yes, I'm still a minor. Somehow, my face just don't fix my status as a minor, i know i know...

Ok back to the topic. Well, nothing can be more shocking with a pre-sem breaking news. I thought it will be my final semester. I was wrong. So wrong. thinking bout graduation without the original bunch of classmates could easily break me down, into parts. I've some friends who even ask me to be the photographer for the graduation that I will, for the time being, pass on. I... erm... I seriously thought that I will need to pass on that. I can't imagine myself breaking down in sad tear, instead of the original happy tears. And, i certainly don't want myself to see that side of me for another round. Yes, 1 round is enough.  Enough.

And, sometimes my determination/stubbornness could just easily kill me. It's really a life changing decision. And certainly got me into all sort of challenges that I could've expected and tackle with ease. But no, I thought I'm good in handling all the challenges. No, I was wrong again. If it wasn't my bunch of friends, I don't think I could get through all these, I don't think I could get this far. And, I deeply appreciate every single help, every one of you, You, YOU. Thank you. I believe I can give a return-favour when it's time.

Regret. Yes, I wouldn't deny that I actually feel regret with certain decision. But, turning it around, if it wasn't all these regretted decision, I wouldn't be any stronger like this. If it wasn't the major breaking, I wouldn't learn how to stand up strong. If it wasn't...

Not to forget, the shadow which accompany since August. =)

Lazy post

Lotsa happening in the pass few months, lotsa happiness, lots of tears, lotsa of disappointment, lotsa achievement.... 

My first marathon went pretty well. It was quite an accomplishment to run a half marathon for the first time. 

Move on, I had the first F in my studies life which is the most shameful of all. It was nobody fault but my own. Time management is a big issue. I played too much, indeed. 

And then, I finally back to my hometown. but didn't get to meet my high school friends at all due to time constraint.

And, I finally managed to get my passport done and had a wonderful short trip with my dearest friends. 

... lazy to type dy...  

I'm not good in talking and thus I try to write

Keep most of the things to yourself is certainly not a wise choice.

That's when all the misunderstandings come in. 

Holding back from crossing the border is meant to be done early,

Not when it's already over the board. 

Wish there's a time machine. Not for changing things, But for looking back to the old happy times.

Really want nothing but the happiness we used to share together. 

Regret. Not for making the mistake, but for the consequences of my mistake.

Really want nothing but to find back the missing pieces of puzzle.

Where did it go wrong between us, my friend?

Appreciate a true friend MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE, I do, I really do.

Worry

Frustrated

Break down

Heal

Pray

Hope

Respect

Accept

Move on

Welcome MacDonald

Finally MacDonald is born!!! see how beautiful my MacDonald....

She is already in jean wear on the first day. and im gonna get her some protection on the inside. xixilli or la senza leh??? or audrey? lol

Wrap up of the season

Time past real fast, it feels like I started my internship few days back, but it has already come to an end. So many happenings going on in these 2 months times. Too much to remember, too little to forget. Anyways, I had a great learning experience at Sunway FSSC. 

It's time to switch back to the uni life

爱

有种真爱不是我的

有些幸福不是我的 

Lost and Found

Lost it on the FRIDAY the 13th August

And,

Found it on the FRIDAY the 21st January

It's just the beginning of all.

2011's Resolution/Goals/Plans

It's the last year of my studies, but i hope it's my first year of long term stay here.

12 months in a year, 12 resolutions/goal/plans:

#1 January, another challenging month to be at SSC because of audit peak period. I hope I can meet whatever deadline as always. Explore new places. Meet new people. Maintain at least 1,3,5 workout day. Build 2/6 pacs. Plan for 14/2.

#2 February, happy ending at FSSC, wonderful start of new semester, fresh start of VUBC. And, a peaceful CNY without family by my side, maybe a small trip by myself for CNY(still considering). Get back to 1,2,3,5 workout day and increase my workout weight.

#3 March, concentrate on study, manage a stable financial position. Adding workout day becoming 1,2,3,5,6/7 and organise the schedule for each workout day.Dedicate more times with my Krazy frens and others as well.

#4 April, continuing 1,2,3,5,67 n build 4/6 pacs, Manage my studies and assignment time. Control my spending habit.check for flighy ticket. plan for homecoming trip.

#5 May, get back to 1,2,3,5 workout day and concentrate more on assignment and studies. Start revision. Get a new laptop perhaps this month. Increase weight.

#6 June, concentrate on exam preparation. Workout day maintain at 1,2,3,5/7 unless clash with exam on the next day. Have a memorable farewell to those who transfer to Aus. Work part time after exam.

#7 July, hopefully homecoming trip run smoothly. Exam result out and then new semester or i shall say last semester. Shall continue the last journey together with others who stay here. Dedicate more time with my frens. Get back to 1,2,3,5,6/7 workout day.

#8 August, all I want, ask, request, beg, hope, wish for this month is a miracle, a miracle I wait for a year.

#9 September, life continues if miracle doesnt happen and time to let it go if it doesnt happen. Assignment time, studies time for the last sem. Increase weight. Start to decide whether to stay or go back.

#10 Assignment and exam preparation. Back to 1,2,3,5. Firming the 4 pacs and start one the 5th and the 6th pacs. Most importantly visible, not under the fat anymore. Enjoy the rest of the time with fellow frens. Continue to think of the future.

#11, exam months and celebration of last paper. Get back to hometown after celebration.

#12, HOLIDAY month

2010 wrap-up session

This is responding to the post one the very 1st Jan 2010: http://storiesbehindem.blogspot.com/2010/01/2010-resolutions.html

#1 Study harder n play harder...lol
      Could've done better

#2 Snap more good pictures to be shared with everyone
      More opportunity to shoot. consider a good job for beginner

#3 Upgrade my lens n perhaps the Cam body

      Upgraded the lens not the camera

#4 Earn more money working at Marketing Dep and other part time as well
     Earned less at marketing dept but got the chance for an internship at sunway

#5 Be a better member of VUBC
      I hope I did

#6 Successfully help out with the VU Voice

      Helped, but EFFORT WAS WASTED!!!

#7 Maintain my body weight below 80kg
     Body weight still around there. But it doesnt matter already since im expecting muscle mass to
     increase

#8 Get more performance experience (dance) than 2009
      Dance with my fellow frens for the annual ball which is awesome!!!

#9 Get to know more dance kaki
      Ly, Sey, Nier, Yen, Yang, Qian, Don

#10 Facebook friends break 600
       This has gone further, it is now 705 ppl in  my fb

#11 Get myself a new laptop
       Soon, VERY SOON

#12 Improve in guitar, learn at least 1 song per month
       Interest on guitar slowly to fade out, it's time to pick up my guitar perhaps

#13 Get a group of best friends rather than a gf...lol im not ready for gf yet
       Yea right, I had a group of KRaZy frens!!

#14 Workout/exercise more as in 2008...or better than that...
       Start out pretty slow in the first half, but pick up the pace in the second half of the years due to
       Ms. Mystery and a new gym buddy then-Jay
      
#15 Talk more to my housemates... yea, we seldom talk n it's kinda weird and strange...
       50/50. Did talk but u know me, I DONT TALK MUCH

#16 A trip to island, can be pangkor/redang/ketam.... whatever... i just wan an island trip
       A simple trip in mid 2009

#17 Make my passport and have an oversea trip as well, im looking toward Bali, HK, Taiwan..
       Didn't get to do my passport... so...

#18 Back to hometown at least once besides CNY
       Yea, I did went back, for my sister's wedding else. (and not going back for 2011 CNY.)

#19 RESERVED TO BE USED IN THE FUTURE
       Did not use it. wasted

So that's it about my 2010 resolution sum up.2011 resolutions coming soon.

藏起来

把你眼中的尘埃 落向大海
旋转木马的小孩 摇摇摆摆 要离开
掌声喝采 祝你一路沿途愉快 带着幸福回来
有人相爱 有人夜里开车看海 天亮了就是未来
如果重来
把心藏起来 把梦藏起来 把你藏起来 把爱藏起来
把笑容藏起来 把泪藏起来 说bye bye

一切应该是安排 不是意外(没有意外)

过去现在 穿越整座城市醒来 没有人记得伤害
我们相爱 最后又分开 一个人的海
一片落叶能够走到多远未来
把心藏起来 把梦藏起来 把你藏起来 我们说bye bye
把笑容藏起来 把泪藏起来 说bye bye
Bye bye
旋转木马的小孩 摇摇摆摆

爱之擦肩而过

感觉对了

可我却什么都没做

就这样让她在面前飘过

满脑子的她

满脑子的烦恼

满脑子的思念

试过去忘记一切关于她的事

没想到却换来无尽的思念

试着放下所有的一切

可是却有种说不出的舍不得，不舍得

试着去解开那死结

反而越结越深

试着在人群中寻找那个唯一的她

却遭到一次次的失败

没想到

没想到恋上一个连名字都不晓得的陌生人

也是一种可能的事情

没想到

没想到一个和你什么关系都没有的陌生人

也能让你念得那么苦

 

他人说，不要放弃

他人说，继续寻找，继续渴望她的出现

可那残忍的现实，

那你我都无法否认的事实

却老老实实地摆在眼前

是上天的安排吗？

还是天真的我自找的麻烦？

这个擦肩而过的陌生人

你何时才会再次出现在我眼前？

Emo

Emo post... read at your own risk.


Somehow something someone has reminded me of the XXX again. and the image of the XXX is still pretty clear in my mind now, surprisingly. i thought i can forget thing easily but i guess certain thing are meant to be remembered for a long long period. and my mind is currently flooded with every pic of the XXX. the forever smoking eyes.... im dieing for that!!!

I swear to god if he give me the chance to bump into her again, I WILL CONFESS to her straight away. oh well, that's how crazy I am. So, pls... Im still waiting for the moment.

Gonna stop here, else will turn real emo... ciao...

Miss you, I...

Surrender

Surrender, originally uploaded by Storiesbehindem.

Do you surrender to problems?
Or you fight back every time you face a problem in your life?

I surrender to problems when it's something that is uncontrollable like "love". Most recent surrender from me would be letting go that special someone that I met, that special someone that get me crazy for almost a month, that special someone that mark down a remarkable history in my love story. That special someone left gym before I gather the courage to ask her name. Well, not gonna spinning around and around at this roundabout. It's time to get going.

And when do you fight back?No no, not physical fight back here. What i mean is stand up and face the problem. This need courage as well. Thing doesn't always as what you've planned. Problems come along with solution and then solution create another new problem. It keeps going on that way. Surrender is definitely no the way to solve problems.

Conclusion is--- SURRENDER smart or FIGHT BACK hard!

Smile

Smile, originally uploaded by Storiesbehindem.

Even though it's colourless,
Even though the tasks are hard
Even though he is your enemy
Even though they don't like you
Even though you did something wrong

When it seem like nothing else can be done,
Put on your biggest asset- SMILE

Live you life with SMILE =)

July 31, 2010 A date with Katy Perry and Wonder Girls

July 31th was a great day that mark down sth new, sth significant in my history.


"IT WAS THE DAY I GAVE MY FIRST TIME TO KATY PERRY AND WONDER GIRLS"

haha, I kept saying Katy Perry is awesome, and yea I wanna repeat it again, SHE IS AWESOME last night!! Finally I've experienced my first concert and WONDER GIRLS were few steps in front of me!!! COOLNESS! AWESOMENESS!!!

But I didn't enjoy to the max... it's all because "half of the world was turned off on me".

Journal of the day,July 18th

I used to be the person who want a lot of things at once, Greedy-if u were to put them all in one word. For once, I was unable to distinguish what is the need and want even though I've study all these in econ. How silly a person can be when he over desire and turn out to become greedy and then everything become a dream and next the bubble burst in the split of second!

People always say it's good to dream blablabla... Yeap, agreed! How can one survive without dream! For me, to dream successfully, one must know how to control his/her dream. You're fail to live the dream if you let the dream to control you. I personally have been struggling to control all the "wants";dream;desires. So far so good I would say.

For once, I was obsessed with DSLR, lens, HTC Touch Pro 2-->Iphone 4-->HTC Desire-->BB Bold II and recently want to get a new laptop from Macbook Pro-->ASUS...... And thanks god to the "angle" for fighting all the "evil" thoughts inside me. Though I'm not sure when are the evils gonna make a return for revenge, but so far it has been well controlled. I no longer wan MBP, no longer crazy bout Canon EOS50D, lensss.... no longer wan BB... no longer want this and that. I thanks myself for the self control which has been well practiced for the past 7 years at least. It's hard especially when there's no one around you to control you when you get lost, what is left with you is the self control the self discipline.

Talking about self discipline, I know deeply that I've change a lot to some people. I know that I'm rude sometimes. I know that I'm lacking in emotional control. I'm struggling with it too, not that I don't know who I've becoming, what kind of person I've change. But I believe the "me" in me is still there. Maybe the new me is just a way to express the stress that i face recently, maybe it's just a temporary one, maybe i need time to adjust and have my so called "self control" back in practice. It's ok to make fun of how i've change, it's ok to say i'm rude, it's ok to throw the words back on me.... im ok with everything anything unless I've totally change to another person which is impossible. Give me time, I'm fighting both the greedy side and the evil side of me... i need some times! Sorry to those who I create disappointment to, hurt with words.... Another apologize to myself for losing my pure side... I'm gonna get it back no matter what's the cost.

To Do List

I hereby officially announced the end of Semester 3. Hope I've did well enough to get through to Sem 4. By that, I mean the exam. Anyways, Sem 3 started off with a pretty well. I was about to reject the responsibility in the club but sth hold me back and tell me that this is the chance to show who I am, and how capable I am in doing thing. So, I accepted the challenge. How challenging of the responsibility that I didn't notice has then almost drag me down to the ground. But, there is always ways to keep myself motivated and I'm glad I did. There were a lot of mistakes as I'm virgin in this kinda of task (virgin enough to use the "virgin" word... lmao) That's how people learn, from mistakes... "Mistake guide you through success- Joseph C." lol

Others than that, I'm gonna admit and agree with the lecturers. They have warned us at the end of sem 2 that SEM 3 is gonna be different, BIG BIG different in fact. Yea, different enough to make me few terrible throughout the whole sem. Things were just somehow different compared to sem 1 n sem 2. They are nothing indeed, to be compared to sem 3. Assignment after assignment, class after class, research after research, presentation after presentation (reserved to be used at the end of sem 4) and of course slacking after slacking. It's all about time management. It's like playing plants vs zombies... One after another before I managed to kill em all!! hmm, btw i finish playing the game within one days, all the level... haha, so proud of myself. hehe

Besides studies, I have few trips: KL Tower Trip, ha i know it sound pathetic, but it was fun at least. Also, I have my first outstation working trip to Melaka. Oww... this was the best job I've ever had so far. I have a queen size bed for me alone at Holiday Inn, sea view from my unit. And them we had food, food, food, and food. Tried nonya, then cendol, chicken rice and some restaurant!! After the outstation job, I stop working temporarily to cope with my studies. And, I am now back to work again... Weeeeheeee... WORK=MONEY=MBP

Actually, I have the second thought of getting PC instead of Mac due to the price. There are so many thing I have to consider in getting a MBP. First, of course the price, after getting that, I'm sure I have to ikat perut dy. Next, talking about switching from PC to Mac is not an easy task, talking about the operating system, thinking about the software problem, also the Photoshop problem.... haiz... I wonder I will end up with a Mac.

FIFAFIFAFIFAFIFAFIFAFIFAFIFAFIFAFIFAFIFA.... FIFA fever on the go... waiting for next match. Chile vs Spain. I hope Chile win lol...

Anyways, after dragging so much on SEM 3 review, i shall start the to do list post...

1. Clean the floor--- checked
2. Clean my ipod--- checked
3. Clear my notes--- checked
4. Organize the Poster Photoshooting album
5. Organize everything in my computer
6. Target earning RM400, 80 working hours in 3 week times
7. New pillow
8. Monday, 1 hr of Zumba n 1 hr of Combat; Abs, chest, back,
9. Tuesday, 1 hr of hip hop; Abs, chest, thigh, arm
10. Wednesday, 1 hr of Combat; Abs chest, back
11. Thursday, free
12, Friday, 1 hr of hip hop; Abs, chest, arm, back


Hope the workout plan goes smoothly and looking forward to reach 78kg before sem 4 commence.

Damn, there is so many things that i wanna buy, laptop, protein, earphone.... haiz...

ciao....

18sx

Well, 18sx here... Nah!!! it's not so 18sx lar. Anyways, this happened some days ago. I was on the way walking to the campus and there were 2 ladies in front of me walking slowly and blocking the godamn narrow pathway! It was not a bit deal anyways with that part. What matter is that they are holding their hand, sorry to say that I actually look in detail, and yea they were holding hand by finger cross finger that type. The first think appeared in my head was ok never mind, this are what girls do, little childish game. It somehow annoyed me though. So I found the opportunity to bypass them and headed to the soya stall and bought my usual MJ. Unfortunately, when I was about to leave the stall the two ladies appeared in front of me again. Again, in same "condition", happily swinging their two closely-sucked-together palms, act as no one is around. Hah! Sweat!!! The weather is already hot plus the extra temperature from the "free show" in front of me, I got even sweaty at the back. I'm like if u wanna do that pls at least be discreet and keep it to yourselves. Be Monogamous k! Lol One more encounter like this, even worse than this one! It happened at the uni, the common area when students hang out for studies, assignment.... So me and my groupmates were busying with our assignment. Opposite me one seat to the left was this girl sitting there doing her school work, whatever it is! Not until the gf come, yea it's gf, you know what I mean. The show started since then! Well it all started with the some little hugging, and I thought, again it may be something all girls can freely do with their frens. But thing get even more Excited when there were close actions, well by close action I really mean CLOSE. You know what I meant, don't you. Haha... One of my fren eventually left the scene, but the others remained. They even spot the really close actions scene where I don't even dare to raise my head to see lor. I was told there were lotsa 18sx scenes! Anyways, the msg that I wanna pass on through this post is that BE MONOGAMOUS all the lbgt. Even though I'm ok with it, well to a certain level, but there are still a lot of people who cannot accept it. It's the fact. And I'm not here to say they are wrong. They are just another human species which is growing nowadays (based on my research 2 years ago). Continuation to the story, I also met guys who holdig hand. But I can 100% accept that, cause they are bangla. It's their tradition. I don't know why but it is their thing since long ago. I hereby announce the end of this 18sx post.

Lil Chick

Lil Chick 2, originally uploaded by Storiesbehindem.

This little chick is cute, beautiful and sweet!!! I did the best I can to save this picture from its original over exposure piece... hmm... don't wanna waste it just to dump into the recycle bin... there u go...

Today is considered as the unproductive day... went to uni to study, but didn't manage to get into the study mode much, all because of GLEE, ALEJANDRO!!!! lol... so much laughter, so much fun...

Had Subway and Sushi king for dinner... and gosh J pull it off just as perfect as Bass... i mean the suspender...lol going to try it out next time!

The Pathway

The Pathway, originally uploaded by Storiesbehindem.

Weeheee!!! Finally come out with another HDR after the long break of doing HDR.... Picture was taken during the KL Tower Trip in raw.

Colourful pathway toward success. Hmm.... is it always that colourful? To me, sometimes it's as dark as the charcoal. But, who cares it's dark or colourless... as long as you enjoy along the journey and learn from ur surrounding...